A Rut

Nine of Scrolls (Swords) - Chrysalis Tarot App

This is a good reading for me right now as I have found myself in a negative thinking rut.  After a couple of challenging months, experiencing the death of friends and loved ones and watching people I care about deal with major health issues, I've begun to live fearfully.  I find myself wondering when it will be my turn to experience a major health issue.  Every pain I feel in my body sends my mind swirling with thoughts of what if,...

Recently I've been thinking that I'd like to get back to the place I was before all of this started happening, back to where I was near the beginning of the year where I found a way to love myself and let myself be joyful.  I like the confirmation this card gives and the description that comes with it in the app that says, "The turmoil will dissipate as you assume greater responsibility for your own well being."  I've been working on that, and will look forward to feeling more peaceful soon.

Daily Lenormand Practice - Garden Party

Stork, Garden, Book - Enchanted Lenormand Oracle

Stork, Garden, Book.

Right away this makes me wonder if a change is coming to our homeschool group.  Our homeschool group gathers regularly for recreational activities.  With the nice weather we've been meeting at local parks.  The moms talk while the kids play.

This also reminds me that I haven't responded to an invitation from one of the other members yet, and that I need to do that today!  She has invited us to come hang out on her back deck while the kids play in her backyard.  

Later,...

I didn't find anything new during the rest of the day with these cards, but I'm really glad they came up and reminded me to respond to that invitation I had completely forgotten about.  It would have been rude of me to blow it off, and we would have missed out on spending time with friends this week.

Daily Lenormand Practice - Drama Online

Birds, Broom/Whip, Coffin - Enchanted Lenormand Oracle

Birds, Broom, which is the whip in other decks, and coffin.

Malicious gossip put to a stop, or perhaps a contentious debate online comes to an end.

Later,...

I play Guild Wars 2 and am in a guild with a group of people who all get together to play every night.  Last night when I got online I was approached by one of the guild members who wanted to make me aware of some recent drama that resulted in her being kicked out of the guild.  I'm relating these cards to that. 

The birds along with the broom/whip could represent online drama, and this particular drama did result in a couple of people leaving the guild.  Honestly, I'm fed up enough with the drama that it may result in the end of my participation with this guild (the coffin).  I ended up not playing with my guild last night because I didn't want to deal with it all.

So, the cards could be saying, "Arguments among network of friends results in end of the guild as it exists," or the end of my participation in the guild or the end of the participation of some members.

Lenormand Daily Practice - Slick Sales

Mice, Fox, Book - Enchanted Lenormand Oracle

As nice as yesterday's cards were these are unfriendly.  I honestly have no idea where they are pointing.  A cunning, manipulative thief has a secret?

Later,...

I was disappointed because, at the end of the day, I could not connect these cards to anything that happened, but while I was lying in bed I remembered that earlier a salesperson had come to the door selling an educational program for kids.  Having been a door to door salesperson for an unscrupulous company in my youth I know that the majority of these companies train their young salespeople to do whatever necessary, including lying, to separate people from their money.

The salesperson that came to our door didn't want to take no for an answer.  She gave us the name of a neighbor of ours who supposedly bought the program and asked if she could come inside and show us what our other neighbors bought.  Finally, before she left she asked my husband for his name, which he gave her.  I said, "You know she's going to go next door and tell our neighbors you bought the program too, right?"  He said that wasn't his problem, which is true.

Anyway, the combination of the mice with the fox would certainly fit the bill for a slick salesperson trying to get our money, wouldn't it?  And the book could represent the educational program she was selling.

Daily Lenormand Practice - Lucky in Love

Ring, Lily, Clover - Enchanted Lenormand Oracle

Ring, Lily, Clover.

What a nice combination of cards to draw.  I think it has something to do with my marriage, which is a good one that is long lasting.  My first thought is someone's gonna get lucky tonight!  It would make sense if the ring represents my marriage, the lily could represent sex, and clovers are lucky.

Later,...

So, it may have been a self-fulfilling prophecy, but this went down just the way I called it.  I will say I was not the initiator, so these cards count more as a prediction than as suggestion, although I will admit the reading put the idea in my head and I might have been putting out some major love vibes. ;-)

New Moon in June

The Fool, Page of Cups - Joie De Vivre Tarot

This is a challenging pair for me to read.  The Fool and the Page of Cups are somewhat similar in my way of thinking, so maybe this reading is asking me to make a subtle shift, not a big sweeping change.

The Fool is about starting a new adventure, following impulses, letting go of worry, and this reading is asking me to release that energy.  The Page of Cups is about being open to my own creativity and/or intuition.  It's about embracing my emotions, emotions that I may be trying to avoid feeling.

Perhaps what I need to release is this feeling I have that I need to do something to usher in transformative change for myself.  I've been all about the goals and tracking my success (and failure) lately.  There is a time and a place for that, but maybe during this phase of my life I should be following my gut a little more, not for the purpose of change, but to just feel what I feel and go where the feeling leads me.  It is a subtle shift, indeed.

This particular fool is in motion about to step off the ledge, and the page is standing still, letting his cup be filled from above.  For this new moon, I'll worry less about stepping out to find my next grand adventure.  Instead, I'll be still and open to it when that next adventure finds me.

Daily Lenormand Practice - Contract Negotiations

Letter, Man, Bear - Enchanted Lenormand Oracle

As a means of practicing Lenormand readings, I plan to draw three cards or so early in the day, write down my thoughts, and then see if I have any insights or clarity at the end of the day.

Letter, Man, Bear

An email, text, or message from a man about,...?  I don't know what the message could be about.  Maybe a way to improve my health and feel stronger. Perhaps an intimidating message, some abuse?

Later,...

I didn't receive any important or intimidating texts or emails.  I wonder if this reading could be referring to the fact that my husband was home late last night because he had a union meeting.  They were discussing the upcoming contract negotiations.  The letter could represent the contract, the man; my husband, and the bear could represent the union.

                   

Playing With Questions

I've been learning a bit about reading Lenormand, which I'm finding is a challenge. I think that's mainly because I don't have any questions I'm really interested in asking right now. In fact, tarot reading has become a bit stale for me for the same reason. I'm tired of asking the same tired questions about how to live a happier life. Know what I mean? I need some other people to read for to spark my interest again. Anyway, last night I was playing around with apps on my phone feeling bored and aimless so I asked, "Who has the answers?" This is the Lenormand spread I pulled on my phone:

 Dondorf Lenormand App

Heart, Lily, Fish.

Keywords that come to mind for these cards are: love, wisdom, wealth.

I read this as, "Your heart has an abundance of wisdom," or maybe "Trust your gut."

What do you see?

Transformation? Dare I hope?

I got the Amethyst card today, and all I can say is, "Yes!" and, "Thank you!"   It feels like truth.  I got goosebumps when I read it. 

I had an experience today with an angry person who is filled with bitterness.  I had tried to reach out to him and offer support and found myself on the receiving end of his anger instead.  Not too long ago I would have been deeply hurt and spent days wondering what I had done wrong and second guessing myself. 

Today I spent a few minutes feeling hurt and angry, and then I felt sad for him and sent him love (quietly and without his knowledge.  I'm not a glutton for punishment!) and then I removed him from my Facebook friends list and blocked him to protect myself from future negativity.  This is HUGE growth for me, and evidence that something transformational is indeed at work in me.

Love

Gaia Oracle App

I pulled a card to serve as a reflection for the day, and this is a beautiful card that is perfectly timed as I have been sensing the beginning of a new cycle for me in the last couple of days.  I've gotten a fresh start on some goals of mine today, and it's important for me to remember that while working on these physical goals I'll be best served if I remember to love.  Love God, love myself, love others.  It's important also for me to remember that as I love, I am loved.

 

Choose Wisely

The Magician, The Tower, Page of Swords - Tarot of the Magical Forest

Your thoughts create reality.  Choose good ones.

or

When you cause a storm, don't be surprised if you get wet.

"But be careful what you wish for cause
you just might get it
you just might get it 
you just might get it"~The Pussycat Dolls


 

New Moon

Two of Swords, Seven of Cups - Joie De Vivre Tarot

These cards together seem to be telling me it's time to make some choices.  Release indecision or the avoidance of deciding and embrace making a choice.   Settle on something and focus there.  The problem is I have no idea what choices I should be making or to which areas of my life these cards might be referring.  Perhaps things will seem clearer in the coming days.  In any case, I'm tired and have a headache, so I'll think more about it tomorrow.

You Are Worthy

Eight of Wands, Nine of Swords, Nine of Cups reversed - Revelations Tarot

Worrying about what others are thinking of you will only impede your progress.  Your self-worth is determined by you, not by the thoughts of others.

"Self worth comes from one thing -- thinking that you are worthy."
~Wayne Dyer

Ready, Set, Action!

Justice, Five of Pentacles reversed, Ace of Swords reversed - Revelations Tarot

Enough thinking about how to get out of that rut.  Act now, and you will be rewarded for your efforts.

"Action is a great restorer and builder of confidence. Inaction is not only the result, but the cause, of fear. Perhaps the action you take will be successful; perhaps different action or adjustments will have to follow. But any action is better than no action at all."
~Norman Vincent Peale

The Battle

Page of Pentacles, The Devil, Seven of Wands

The biggest battle you will face in making your dreams come true is escaping the prison of your own negative thinking.

"Do not allow negative thoughts to enter your mind for they are the weeds that strangle confidence."
~Bruce Lee

Baffled

For the last few days I've been pulling three cards and trying to interpret them with a one or two sentence message.  It's not as easy to do as I thought it would be. I've liked the reads I've come up with so far, but I have to say, the cards I pulled today have me rather stumped.   I'll share two interpretations that I came up with, but I'm not at all satisfied with either.  Please share what you see!

Six of Swords, Four of Pentacles, The Hermit - The Gilded Tarot

You won't find the peace you are looking for by running from your problems or hoarding your resources.  Look inside.  You had the answer all along.

Or

Start saving your pennies for that trip you've been dreaming of and longing to take.

What do you think?

Thoughts Matter

Five of Pentacles, Knight of Wands, Nine of Pentacles - The Gilded Tarot

 Be the hero of your story.  Start by choosing the right thoughts.

“Keep your thoughts positive because your thoughts become your words. Keep your words positive because your words become your behavior. Keep your behavior positive because your behavior becomes your habits. Keep your habits positive because your habits become your values. Keep your values positive because your values become your destiny.”
~ Mahatma Gandhi 

 

Abundance

Nine of Swords, Ten of Pentacles, Ace of Pentacles - The Gilded Tarot

Don't let fear block the gifts the Universe is giving you.  Accept those gifts with gratitude, share them with others and watch a river of abundance flow from you to others and back to you again.

"Whatever we are waiting for - peace of mind, contentment, grace, the inner awareness of simple abundance - it will surely come to us, but only when we are ready to receive it with an open and grateful heart."   Sarah Ban Breathnach

Breaking Up Is Hard to Do

Recently I needed to end a friendship, and I'm still spending so much of my time thinking about it, even though I know it was the right decision.  I decided to pull some cards for some insight, and chose to use a spread I found at Biddy Tarot.

Release and Let Go

1. What am I feeling right now?
2. Why am I feeling it so strong?
3. How can I release this feeling?
4. What is the feeling transforming into?
5. How can I rise above?
6. What is my new beginning?
7. What have I learned?

Joie De Vivre Tarot

The Five of Swords speaks to the sense of loss that I am feeling, and the tension, hostility and conflict which ultimately led to my decision in the first place.  Although I know that moving on was necessary those feelings linger still.

Why am I feeling it so strongly?  Death.  Well, because it was a huge and transformational change, Sweetheart.  You can't expect to end a friendship of fifteen years and shrug it off like nothing happened. 

The Six of Cups tells me that I should surround myself with the people and things in my life that I love.  It's a good time to count my blessings. 

The Empress provides so much hope.  This feeling of loss and conflict will transform into a feeling of abundance (perhaps by reflecting on those blessings alluded to in the Six of Cups) and creativity.  I think I will be birthing my very self, my true self.

When I'm feeling dragged down again by these feelings, the Three of Wands tells me to remember those plans I have, and I do have many that are already underway.  I have so many wonderful things to look forward to this year.  I'm making dreams of mine come true.  I need to put my energy into my own life, and not spend anymore time lamenting what is past.

The King of Wands advises me to not sit in the planning stages of those wonderful things to come, but to use this new found energy and vision to charge ahead and make that vision a reality.

What have I learned?  The Ace of Cups.  Yeah.  I've learned to let myself feel what I feel and to trust my feelings.  Sometimes, and with some people I put my instincts on hold because I don't want to believe what they are telling me.  I've been guilty of violating myself to please someone else, and what I've learned is, violating myself is just as bad as hurting someone else.  I am the only one who can know what I feel.  I need to trust me.

It's Up to Me

I've had some recent success in losing weight, so I pulled three past/present/future cards asking, "Will I continue to be successful in this area, and will I accomplish my goal?

King of Wands, Three of Pentacles, Page of Pentacles - Shadowscapes Tarot

The King of Wands points to the high level of energy and motivation I've brought to the table recently with this new effort toward accomplishing my goals which are: 1) accepting myself unconditionally 2) losing excess weight 3) being more plugged into my life.  I've started a new eating plan, have been going to yoga classes for the first time in my life, and have finally gotten serious about being kind to myself, which has meant leaving some things behind that hinder me.

The Three of Pentacles, I believe, is speaking of the support system I've built for myself.  I have friends both far and wide online and locally who are aware of my goals and have been cheering for me and interested in hearing about my progress, or lack thereof as the case may be at times. My husband is joining me in learning to eat more healthfully, and my kids understand what I'm trying to accomplish and are helping in many ways.

My big question was, "Will I accomplish my goal?" What I really wanted to know is if I'll ever wear my skinny jeans again!  The card in the future position doesn't indicate that I won't reach my goal, nor does it indicate that I will.  Rather, it tells me to hang in there, stay focused, keep working on it.  It suggests I may have a few more things to learn and maybe I can find some wise teachers along the way.

The description of the card from the book says, "The Page of Pentacles comes bearing her message for opportunities of growth and prosperity.  It is a small spark she holds, but she is just the harbinger for potential.  Make of that spark what you will -- a mere smoldering coal or the blaze of a rising star -- but that choice and vision is something that each individual must find on their own, using skills and resources at hand."

So, I guess that means whether or not I'm successful depends on me.  Hmmm.  That could be good news or bad, and again, I suppose it depends on how I choose to look at it.  I think I'll readopt an old mantra I used a few years ago when I was facing a similar challenge, and that is:  I can't fail unless I give up.