Surrender and Love

I was so inspired by my reading yesterday that I went out this morning and took a walk. It was a nice walk, and I was really proud of myself for getting moving again after being in such a slump.  I was listening to my music and enjoying the scenery when I just started bawling.  I never do that.  It was so weird.  I wasn't sad or mad.  I think I was just enjoying myself and feeling joy.

 Later I bought myself a new blouse and got a haircut, but first I drew three cards.

The Hanged Man, Queen of Coins, Page of Wands - The Joie De Vivre Tarot

I think it's interesting that two of these cards showed up for me yesterday.  They are telling me that I need to accept myself, as I am right now, while I continue to take care of myself.

I tend to withhold things from myself because I don't weigh what I want to weigh.  I don't buy myself new clothes, and I only take the most basic care of my appearance.  It's that old perfectionism again.  Why bother with jewelry, pretty clothes, or makeup when my body is so unattractive?  And then I don't go out into the world because I'm ashamed of how I look.

These cards are saying, "Enough of that!  Accept who you are right now.  Make the most of what you've been given.  Feed your body and your soul well while you patiently wait to see the changes that loving yourself, really loving yourself, will bring.  In the meantime, get out there and live life! Find joy!  You deserve all of this right now."